We only remember __% of what we hear

physiological process of receiving stimuli

(passive listening)

process of receiving, interpreting, and applying stimuli

(active listening)

1. empathic

2. appreciative

3. comprehensive

4. critical

1. Noise-distractions

2. experiential superiority-believing we are superior to others

3. egocentrism-selfishness

4. defensiveness-rejecting arguments that critique our worldview

1. Physical: external

2. Mental: internal

3. Factual: overwhelmed by  too much info/details

4. Semantic: confused by language

1. invite additional comments

2. ask ?s

3. identify areas of agreement or common experience

4. vary verbal responses

5. provide clear verbal responses

6. use descriptive responses

7. provide affirming statements

8. avoid finish sentences for others

9. allow the other person the opportunity of a complete hearing

10. restate the content of the speakers message

11. paraphrase

1. Logos

2. Pathos

3. Ethos

Logos

• Type of proof
• LOGIC/EVIDENCE
• statistics
• examples
• testimony

• type of proof
• EMOTION/VALUES
• thriftiness
• social needs
• physical

• type of proof
• CREDIBILITY
• competence
• trustworthy
• goodwill
• identification
• dynamic

Proof/Data -> Argument/Claim (Link) -> Warrant/Reasoning

Example:

It is dark cloudy & moist.

Past experience says that when it is dark cloudy and moist it rains.

It is going to rain.

4 Types of Strong Reasoning

1. Inductive

2. Deductive

3. Causal

4. Analogical

Instance -> Generalization

Example:

Joel is cool, therefore, HONS170 is cool.

Generalization -> Instance

Example:
Minnesotans are nice, therefore, Alyssa is nice.

Cause -> Effect

Example:

Rise in sex education leads to lower teen pregnancy rates.

Type of strong reasoning

Example:

Great Britain healthcare system is successful -> 

The US has a similar model ->

US healthcare system will be succesfull

1. communication b/t 2 or more (15) people

2. interdependent (common fate. shared goals.)

3. consistent pattern of interaction

4. communication over a period of time.

5. intentional (purposeful)

(not just talking to someone at a bus stop)

1. understand ourselves (social comparison theory)

2. understand others (uncertainty reduction theory)

3. understand world/fulfill needs

4. enriching & positive experiences (social exchange theory)

Why do we form relationships with particular individuals?

1. similarity/symmetry

2. complementarity (they have strengths where we have weaknesses)

3. responsiveness (they listen to us, care)

4. attraction - physical. social. task.

5. proximity

6. status

7. Schutz's Theory

8. Maslow's Theory

9. Argyle's Theory

Schutz's Theory

theory of why we form relationships

• inclusion need: to include, to be included
• control: to control/be controlled. have someone listen to you (advice)
• affection: to give/receive affection

theory of why we form relationships

Hierarchy of Needs.

Bottom must be met before we can move up the pyramid.

Self actualization (we set goals/priorities)

^

Self esteem

^

Social

^

Safety

^

Physiological (food shelter water)

• nonsocial drives
• dependence-inclusion
• affiliation-inclusion
• dominance-control
• sex-affection
• self esteem & self consistency

Gender Differences in Self Disclosure:

MASCULINE

• avoid self disclosure in order to maintain control in relationship
• dislose more to strangers
• report talk

Gender Differences in Sef Disclosure:

FEMININE

• avoid self disclosure to limit hurt
• disclose more to people they know
• rapport talk

bonding through doing

• report accomplishments
• give instructions
• provide directions

bonding through conversation

express intimate information

• evaluation: call into question the worth of the person
• control: aims @ getting others to do what you want
• strategy: plan to get what you want
• neutrality
• superiority
• certainty: taking rigid positions

• Description: describes your own feelings
• Problem orientation: solve problems together
• Spontaneity: be open/honest
• Empathy
• Equality
• Provisionalism: showing flexibility in positions

• communication training
• behavioral flexibility (androgenous behavior, bargaining)
• couple time
• patterns/habits
• daily routines

• commit to making a positive change
• engage in self monitoring
• actively use comm. to shape climates
• utilize critical empathic listening
• accept & confirm others
• affirm & assert yourself
• self disclose when appropriate
• respect diversity in relationships
• encourage a supportive comm. climate
• rely on "I" instead of "you"
• use relational language when possible:"we/us"
• engage in behavioral flexibility

• communication across cultures
• communication w/others who share a different world view

a way of seeing and understanding the world

a perspective

a philosiphy 

a group of people who share values, beliefs, attitudes, customs, traditions, clothing, artifiacts, etc.

Example

Students

Farmers

a group of people who share similarities with a dominant culture but also maintain characteristics that set them apart from the dominant culture.

Example

 SCSU students

Dairy farmers

value achievment, material wealth, competition, heroism

value traditional roles for men/women

(U.S.)

rigid rules

tradition

strict punishment

feel secure

tolerate ambiguity

uncertainty

diversity

(U.S.)

value equality

minimize status differences & rich/poor gap

equal power

rules are implied

follow tradition/norm

rules are listed, questioned, and challenged

(U.S.)

value individual freedom, choice, uniqueness

take care of self & immediate family

(U.S.)

do one thing at a time

sensitive to deadlines

(U.S.)

do many things at once

less enslaved by deadlines

less concerend about punctuality

nonverbal communication

aware of surroundings/mood

don't understand sarcasm

take words literally

verbal communication

(U.S.)

more personal space

more uncomfortable being touched

(U.S.)

bonding through doing

MEN

bonding through talking

WOMEN

the language of a social community

 language of a co-culture

switching between languages/dialects

Example:

speaking differently around your friends and in a business setting

judging a culture according to its own context

(opposite of ethnocentrism)

being aware of our communication & the response to our communication

(high self monitor)

1. conduct a personal assessment
2. practice supportive comm. behaviors/listen & ask questions
3. develop sensitivity toward diversit/develop mindfulness/adopt the perspective of cultural relativism
4. avoid stereotypes/tolerate ambiguity
5. avoid ethnocentrism
6. develop code sensitivity
7. seek shared codes
8. use & encourage descriptive feedback
9. open communication channels

small group communication

communication b/t 3-15 people

share a common purpose/fate

interdependent

shared identity: communicating w/each other over some time. have influence over each other

• more ideas/more info/more viewpoints
• shared responsibility/shared benefits
• supportive climate;encouragement
• more creativity
• test ideas
• better solutions
• make better decisions
• learn about yourself
• learn skills necessary for participation in a democratic society

relationship groups- concerned with maintaining relationships

(friend/family)

1. getting off subject
2. no goals or agenda
3. too lengthy
4. poor preparation
5. inconclusive
6. disorganized
7. ineffective leadership
8. irrelevant information
9. time wasted
10. starting late
11. no effective decision making
12. interruptions within/without
13. individuals dominate
14. rambling/redundant
15. no published results
16. cancel/postponed meetings